I'm so hurt. In the three years I've worked with NOAA, I've never ever had a bad review. Ever. I've always received a bonus (which I use for Christmas), an increase in pay and a 5 year riff protection. I received the 5 year protection thing but nothing else. Why?! If I'm such a "Joy" to work with, and "one of the most reliable people on board" and "absolutely brilliant" why did I not receive the same as everyone else? I come in early, I leave late. I work through lunch and don't take any breaks. My ass is firmly planted in this stupid chair answering the farking phone. I don't receive overtime pay for anything past my 9 hours. and I often work 11 a day.
I know I should be grateful that I have employment. That I wake up every morning with a roof over my head, I have someone who loves me, great kids. But right now, at this very moment, I hate everything. I hate life. I hate being poor. I hate that for the first time in my divorced life, I can't buy a damn thing for Christmas. And what I hate the most right now? I can't stop crying.
Did they base this on my health problems? the surgery I had to have? Although it was written in the review that I took my computer home to work while recovering.
Yeah. So I really don't want to hear from anyone on how lucky I am right now. I don't feel it. It isn't all about the bonus. My feelings are hurt because I work my butt off and it wasn't noticed. Next year? I'm not volunteering to cover other divisions. I'm not answering phones when other secretaries are out. I'm not taking my computer home and working on the weekend because someone has had an emergency travel and needed a ticket STAT. Nope. I'm not stepping outside my box anymore because obviously it goes unnoticed and isn't worthy.
And a few minutes ago I got to listen to two other people talk about their $2,000 bonus. WTF?
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